Letting the other woman destroy your self esteem

So, I’ve noticed a common thread with women who have been cheated on…they obviously want to know why their husband ended up in my bed (seriously, my sex skills are amazing) but before even evaluating an affair for what it really is or even letting their husband give them a real answer they seem to think I am better than them…as a fellow female this slightly crushes me…I personally am lucky enough to have the body of a runway model (thanks to an amazing personal trainer, a fairly good idea of what to eat and decent genes) but I’m nothing special…I rarely wear makeup, I am very girlie when I dress but I do not keep my nails done 24-7 and I only hit the salon once a week for my hair….I can tell the few women who have seen me have sized me up immediately and wondered “ew, why her?” or “she’s not really more attractive than me, is she?”…the short answer is no, I am not…I am nothing special…I am like every other female, fairly average with a few special talents and honestly most likely nothing like you.  So why did your husband pick me?  I sadly cannot answer that for EVERYONE but there seem to be some common things I have noticed about men…

-I am easy to talk to…I think this has to do with my personality (I am EVERYONE’S best friend) but even so I’ve noticed plenty of men have conversations with me that should be saved for their wife…I hear it all from men…fears, problems, daily stress, marriage issues, issues with children, thoughts in general, etc…I’ve asked a few men why they do not speak to their wives about these things and they are quick to say “she doesn’t understand me” (no one understand men, wtf do they expect?!), “she’s not as easy to talk to as you are”, “she’s so judgmental” (women, we often want men to listen to us “just talk” so why don’t we do it for them?), “I can’t connect with her”, etc…  This is something to consider women, every long term affair I have ever had has started off as an emotional affair and even if you’re speaking to your husband, are you connecting with him?

-I am “fun”and I love to sexually satisfy the man I’m with…I have mastered the art of flirting with men..I enjoy sexy lingerie when men are around…I am a complete freak in bed…these are all things I hear men complain about wives not doing, refusing to do or being so reluctant to do that it would never be enjoyable for a man…I question women who refuse to sexually satisfy their men…I often hear of women putting their husband on sex restrictions or flat out refusing to do things in bed that their husband enjoys…I feel as if these women are setting themselves up to be cheated on…men will be men and I am not advocating turning yourself into someone you’re not to please your husband (he should know the real you anyway) but he should be satisfied and know you find him attractive…this won’t make your relationship “cheat proof” but it’s one less urge he’ll look to other women to fulfill

Those are two major reasons it’s easy for me to get married men (and single men when I want them) and this is why it crushes me when women start to questions themselves too much and act as if there is something wrong with them…I would immediately advise wives not to let these thoughts cross your mind…you’re going to beat yourself up and possibly crush your self esteem thinking things that aren’t true…even if your husband has left you for another woman a lot of times it’s because of deeper issues that he had (not you)…

JTM and I met while I was out running and there was no hiding that he was attracted to me…his wife took the kids on a vacation for a month to visit her parents back home and he immediately saw that as his opportunity to have me over to the house.  I looked at plenty of their pictures and even noticed their marriage certificate above their bed and figured that they were a decently happy family.  I got the feeling maybe JTM was married to a woman who was slightly controlling, possibly did not give him enough attention or maybe his wife never actually spoke to him (being active duty military and coming from a war zone probably requires professional help but a caring wife probably goes a long way too).  JTM started off with slight respect to a certain extent and the first few times we just hung out and talked and had a few drinks…it wasn’t until one night in tears talking to me about a traumatic experience that he kissed me and we had sex on his sofa.  After that night he seemed to not be able to get enough of me and often wanted me in the bed he shared with his wife (even I had a slight issue doing that but I got over it) and unfortunately that lead to a pair of my panties being left under their bed.  When his wife got back from vacation she found them and seemed to honestly WANT to believe his story of “I put them there to see if you would trust me” but she dug a bit deeper and contacted me (along with a bunch of her friends who had their own opinions of me).  I sucked it up and just told her the truth since he was also on the phone and I saw no further reason to lie to her and she broken down in tears and then talked to me about how disgusted she was that I had done that in her house and in her bed (not that I cared too much how she felt).
She indirectly kept in contact with me and apologized eventually for the attempted insults and supposedly they repaired their marriage…she told me outside of knowing her husband had cheated she had found my panties and knew that I was so much slimmer than her and also wore sexier clothes than her.  She said she had gotten it in her head almost immediately that her husband did not want her because she was fat, couldn’t dress and was most likely bad in bed.  I decided to be nice and realistic about the conversations I’d had with her husband and let her know none of that was true and he actually told me how much he loved her and their family quite often.  I told her I had seen her pictures and I might have been a smaller size but she wasn’t the unattractive woman she had seemed to paint herself to be in head and that if she was in fact trying to reconcile her marriage those thoughts were useless.  She thanked me for speaking with her and apologized again…and begged me to contact her if her husband ever tried to get in contact with me again.  I never heard from her again (luckily) and I ignored the random texts from her husband (I figured I didn’t need to let her know about them either I didn’t owe her anything)
She was the first wife to contact me and let me know how she felt without being too psycho and it has made me realize from that day…women should not belittle themselves…no matter what…



About C.X.Love

I'm the woman that most females hate...I am the other woman in your relationship or in some cases just the woman your husband had an affair with...this MY side of the story, not that you care but maybe some of you can protect your relationships from me...or maybe some of you will just be entertained because my life is amazing...
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8 Responses to Letting the other woman destroy your self esteem

  1. SVC says:

    What a load of BS and self glorification!

    • Sally b says:

      Agree talk about up her own arse, men cheat its what they do not because your slim… Your a hooker a slag who spreads her fishy fanny to all the men a walking std.

  2. Sunshine says:

    Why would you do that?? You are a flat out whore. Knowing he was married and still sleeping with him–You MUST be white trash. Sorry, but I am a sexy educated married woman who had a husband who cheated. Men are men, and if nasty women like you would stop being so disrespectful to yourself, then maybe you wouldn’t attract the worst side of the married man. Maybe then you would attract the amazing single ones. Unfortunately, you say you could have single men, but I bet they see that you are used goods and would rather pick up a classy woman who carries herself with confidence. You scream insecurity–THAT is why married men go after you. EASY bate. Simple as that. They always come running back to their wife, realizing how much better they are than your type. I thank the woman who tried to steal my husband away. He needed to see what he really had.

  3. Eva says:

    I actually used to work in the adult industry. Your complete selfishness and disregard are something else. I’ve spoken to wives and let them know when their husbands or significant others continued to contact me. Sorry, but you do on some level have an obligation to that woman because you should be accountable for your actions when you choose to involve yourself in another woman’s home situation. You sound like a child, and not an adult.

  4. kp says:

    I am sorry that women are calling you horrible names when you are just telling the truth. I do believe that you are missing out tho. There was a time in my life when I only enjoyed the beginning of a relationship. That may be what you enjoy. In these types of relationships you never experience trust. Nor do you need it. You are a beautiful sexy woman now, but someday you will have fewer options. (You will not be able to hide the fact that you are getting older and you will become uglier if there is no love in your heart.) I have always known in my heart that I wanted a long-term, best friend type of relationship (with hot sex). Now that I am older, I found out why. Our looks and our sex life are not going to be what holds us together in the long run. It is the fact that there is somebody else in this world that loves us and is willing to show it by being there for us even when a more beautiful option breezes by. Thank you for telling us not to feel inferior to the other woman. You are correct. I used to feel that way, it destroyed me for a few years. Now I don’t feel that way because I get the feeling that your path does not lead to the same consequences as my path does.

  5. Maria says:

    Maybe this will shed some light: Attempting to steal a woman’s husband and a child’s father is as equal a moral crime for a woman, as rape is for a man. She is a threat to the most sacred unit on earth, the family.

    I have been through hell and back with my husbands affair. He fell in love with someone else. I am sexy, beautiful, and a total freak in bed. I adore him to the moon and back but still… he managed to find someone on FB to fall in love with and meet in a hotel. She is married with 2 little kids of her own! I can’t understand this at all. Since the affair, I only contacted her once by email to say “this is our story, stay out of it.” After that I realized she probably doesn’t care, wont stop unless he tells her to and isn’t worth my getting crazy over. She wrote back saying “he is yours I will never bother him again.”

    When I found out, my husband said he was a monster and put our family through hell for bad sex. Well, he is a proven liar so I highly doubt this is true. Yet, 14 months after his affair and I am still wondering if he is in touch with her. She lives 15 hours away from us and he never leaves on business or anything else. He has not been gone from home for more than a few hours and I always know where he is (he tells me, I never ask). I haven’t mentioned his affair for at least 6 months and when we argue, I remind myself to speak to him as I would a stranger and work through the argument. We have made great progress since I stopped being such a bitch.

    My question is: Is it worth it to carry on an emotional affair via email, phone calls and texts (only while he is at work)? Would you do this? It has been 14 months since I found out and the affair was online for 6 months, 1 night in a hotel…

    He is getting everything he needs from me. Trust, admiration, crazy sex, freedom, laughs and I am the old fashioned type that believes in doting on her man. He is well taken care of an admired. Should I be worried that they are still “talking?”

  6. mikki says:

    LOL you guys kill me going off on her like that. Please. Men do what they want to do. I walk around here sexy and men with their wives are dripping with “pick me!” look on their faces. Stop blaming the other woman. It’s your husband that is the problem. After all, he spoke and broke the vows, not her, right?

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